melayan perasaan.

4 days more to go b4 we welcome d month of june.
half year already passed by.
what did we achieve in life?
in career-wise?
love-life..
mission?
dreams?
all the azam d bln januari sudah tercapaikah?

me, masih bkerja d takuk lama.
i dont even apply for any job since like forever.
its not dat i love my job so much but talking about the keselesaan, yes, im too comfortable with what i have now.
even i have to work thru shifts but it dont bother me.
dah biasa org kata..

love-life?
emmmm skip dat part boleh?
hehe..
well, im still d same :fieza-who-loves-n-enjoy-being-single-not-even-yet-looking kinda person.
single sucks sometimes.
hurtful when u have to attend another schoolfrens' weddings here n there.
even my juniors are producing babies ok..
hah.panick attack d situ.
thinking about dat, mula laaaa takot..
my biological clock is ticking now okkkk..
i wanna get married b4 i reach the age of 30.
i want to stop making babies when i reach 37.
it'll be like 10 yrs to rock the bed.hahahaa..
i shouldnt elaborate more then. ;P

mission?dreams?
well, this is the hardest part.
but i'll share w u anyway..

remember how semangatnya saya menguruskan badan stat bln januari lepas?
well, after losing 5kg, i lost my semangat.
i started to eat like a pig.again.
i dont diet.i eat whatever i want to.day n nite.
ayam penyet is like my daily dinner.
i even had double cheese burger when its 10 at nite.
i hardly jog or brisk walking anymore.
i hate to do sit ups or any kind of exercises.
yoga?huh jaoh sekali!

i dunno why i suddenly stop doing what i started.
maybe lack of motivation,no boyfriend to tell me;

"sayang, i'll purchase dat nine west handbag if u can lose 15kg" or
"baby, ure on diet remember!!! u cant eat those!"
"u look prettier if u lose another 5kg.if u can fit M size, i'll buy u a top from warehouse"
or
"gym at 6 ok"

waaahhhh..if i have dat kind of man, i can lose 1kg per day i tell u!
hahha.in ur dreams la fieza...

*sigh*

back to the reality..
i cant put the blame on any other person.
there's no excuses.
nak 1000 daya.tanak 1000 dalih kan?

im a failure.
i failed to determine myself.
i failed to keep up to my own promises.

if i keep doing what ive been doing starting january, i should've been losing about 20kg. TWENTYYYYYYY!!!
but what have i done to myself?
gosh!

so people, i need to start from scratch.[again]
i will be on diet mode starting tomorrow.
i will tell u how much i weigh n insyaAllah this tym i'll be at my best to lose like what i achieved b4.

my aim: i'll keep dat to myself.
to u hat-c, im looking forward to see what u hv for me when i finally can lose what u hv challenged me.
remember right?how many kg i wont tell la.malu.heh.
hat-c, if i can lose ** kg, can i have a brand new perfume set?
i want pretty by elizabeth arden.heh.

semangat!
semangat!